top of page
Writer's pictureR.M. Couse

Embracing a Kinder Santa Narrative

Updated: Oct 8


The idea of using Santa as a behavior management tool, rooted in fear or control doesn't align with a more empathetic parenting style.
Embracing a Kinder Santa Narrative

As a parent, my approach to Santa has evolved over time. From creating elaborate tales to embracing a more compassionate narrative, the way we introduce Santa to our children has shifted. While traditions vary, a shift towards empathy and understanding seems more fitting in today's parenting landscape.


In the past, I went to great lengths to uphold the Santa tradition, creating an enchanting story with special wrapping paper and imaginative explanations for every question. However, my sons will take a different approach with their children. Rather than presenting Santa as an absolute reality, they'll explore him as a story or legend, enjoying the fun of make-believe without blurring the lines between fiction and reality.


In our evolving world, families have diverse ways of celebrating, and this includes the tale of Santa Claus. There's no need for eventual confessions about Santa's existence; honesty from the start can foster a deeper trust between children and parents.

Regardless of your family's choice regarding Santa, whether fully embracing the tradition, presenting it as a story, or opting out entirely, the decision is yours to make.


Yet, for those incorporating Santa into their festivities, it's time to reconsider the conventional narrative:

"Santa knows if you’ve been bad or good..."


The idea of using Santa as a behavior management tool, rooted in fear or control, doesn't align with a more empathetic parenting style. For years, this notion puzzled me—why promote excitement for Santa while also instilling fear of judgment and conditional gift-giving based on compliance?


In the era of evidence-based parenting, where connection and understanding prevail over control, Santa's role should shift from coercion to compassion. Imagine a Santa who celebrates each child's uniqueness without expecting conformity. An elf on the shelf creating mischief for joy is delightful, but one surveilling children with the threat of gifts withheld is unsettling.


In this new narrative, I envision Santa as someone who, much like a parent striving for understanding, acknowledges each child's strengths, interests, and underlying reasons for their actions. A Santa who accepts all emotions, acknowledging that every feeling is valid.


Therefore, if Santa remains a part of your holiday, I hope he brings empathy and kindness to every child, embracing them just as they are.


No matter how your family celebrates, I extend warm wishes for resilience and well-being throughout the holiday season and beyond.

In the comments, let me know if and how Santa plays a role in your family celebrations. Has your Santa narrative changed from the traditional, ... better not cry, better not pout ...?


~R.M. Couse~


For new blog post alerts and updates, subscribe at https://www.rmcouse.ca/contact













Comentarios


bottom of page